Saturday, November 29, 2008

Los Angeles, CA: Arsonists Attack Vivisector

The holidays are coming up and Santa was checking his list twice to see whose been naughty or nice. The name Goran Lacan caught Santa's eye as having done abominable things to small monkeys inside the labs at UCLA. Santa had his elf or in this case, alf, check Lacan's department lab records.

Santa discovered that Goran Lacan studied human eating disorders like anorexia and obsesity in vervet monkeys by implanting electrodes into their skulls and backs and invoking painful stimuli. After a long period of time, he killed them. So early November 20th when Santa was out delivering pieces of coal to those who were naughty, one of his stops was Goran Lacan's house at 3448 Greenfield Avenue in Los Angeles.

When Santa went into his knapsack to pull out his last piece of coal he discovered that there wasn't any left, just a lone incendiary device. Santa thought this was the perfect gift to give a monster like Lacan and placed it under his car.

As the sun was coming up he headed back to the North Pole to check his list for other names of naughty vivisectors. Santa wished Lacan was in the car at the time the fuel ingnited, but hopefully he will be next time.

Santa sends this message to all vivisectors this holiday season: those who experimented on primates in the past, currently or thinking about it in the future, it may not be tomorrow or next month that his alfs will find you so that he can bring you other gifts you deserve.

Santa never forgets to give out presents to primate vivisectors.
Students and Workers for the Liberation of UCLA Primates


Anonymous said...

me and my auntie alfie love primates, how could that asshole ever do those things to them?

Anonymous said...

Those who want to continue torturing animals in so called research would stop at nothing to keep doing what they are doing, maybe even bomb their own car, or putting an article on the internet, then accuse animal activists...
I do not trust these scientists, all they care about is money, and dissecting animals one piece at a time.

Anonymous said...

What's funny is that I came upon this site by accident, and I am well aware of the house and incident you are speaking of. It happened right on my street, Greenfield Ave. The one near Palms Middle School, right? Well if you haven't noticed, you vandalized the wrong car. The car you vandalized was owned by my friend, NOT the scientist you're speaking of. He lived two doors down. You fail, and I hope whoever you are, you get caught.